David of Killoughy

David of Farran is the youngest member of Farran's Killahoy Clan. He is also the current holder of the title of Great-High-Pure Class King. King David became the first person in the Modern Farran Age (MFA) to declare the borders of a Kingdom and claim it for himself. While long ago in the Classic Farran Age (CFA) this was commonplace, the establishment of Kingdoms fell out of favour with many during the 20th Century, and Kingdoms in the area disappeared by 1940.

Farran History
After one particularly long night in "How's Your Mother?" one of Farran's famous 17 and a half pubs, King David (then simply known as "David the Dayce") accidentally made his way to the basement of said pub while trying to find the toilet (which, incidentally, is on the roof of the building). Here, he found ancient manuscripts with the history of Farran on them, as the pub has existed since the 17th Century. Learning of the then-defunct position of Great-High-Pure Class King, the young David knew he was destined to rule the land of Farran. However, as he read, he realised that many Kingdoms used to exist, not just Farran, and that each had their own leaders.

Wanting not only to conquer his own land, but to also let others do the same, the soon-to-be King took it upon himself to research the old ways of rulership, Kingdoms, and the structure of land. He then preached these teachings to anyone who would listen, as far as modern-day Carrigrohane County. Once he felt he had preached enough, King David made his move and declared the borders of Farran, simultaneously declaring himself its leader. Soon after, other leaders rose up and declared their own Kingdoms in places such as Ovens, Ballygroman, and Kilcrea. While it did take a while to reach the Region we now call The East, King David's system steadily grew, and once The Bearded Baron declared the borders of the District of Muskerry a domino effect was created whereby many leaders seized lands for themselves in a very short period.

Without question, King David is solely attributed for the reinstatement of the Classic Farran system of ruling. He shaped the Modern Farran Age unlike anyone else, and is considered on-par with some of the most highly-regarded monarchs of the land throughout history in terms of influence.

Sauce Epidemic of 2020
Beginning some time in 2020, King David's Kingdom was taken by an unprecedented spreading of a disease throughout its land. Thinking themselves safe within the bounds of Farran where "the Covid shtuff daren't tread" (Killoughy, 2020), the Farran populace was shook to its core when they were hit with an epidemic of sauce.

Though the cause of the epidemic is not fully known, it is the widely-held belief that it was caused when Kingloughy himself discovered that it was possible to buy sauce online from SuperValu and have it shipped straight to his door. After getting his Eircode wrong 43 times in a row, the King finally succeeded on his 44th go. However, each of the other 43 orders also went through and happened to be the Eircodes for every other household in the area, leading to 10 bottles of the good shtuff landing on each Farraner's door step. Despite the receipts being with each order, showing his payment of them, David the Dayce has denied the blunder stating, "No, no, t'weren't me at all! I did computers in UCC!", but an inside source said he had drank from the alcoholic well on his land before he made the order and was "off his game".

After the delivery, Farran devolved into chaos with an event that is now referred to by scholars simply as The Piss-Up. Seeing his kingdom in peril and definitely not because he wanted to horde all of that sweet, sweet sauce to himself, the King put out a decree for all bottles to be brought to Offaly House. When the decree was completely ignored by every household in the land who were all nursing a collective hangover, the King sent out Big Jim to round up any remaining sauce and return it to the royal throne room, leaving all other Farran households with only one bottle each. In doing this, King Dave declared that he was "taking the burdens of the epidemic" onto his own shoulders so that "nobody else will know the pain of the sauce."

When asked in early 2021 if his leadership had been impaired in any way by his use of sauce, David of Killoughy replied by saying "Ah, shtick to the cratur" and then punching a woman made of bees.